Start-the-the-day-right Smoothie


Breakfast, anyone? I just got off my second round of HCG drops, during which you have to be on a very restrictive diet. Today was my first day of ‘Phase 3’, or P3 as we call it, and now anything but sugar and starch is on my menu. So. What should we have for breakfast? Eggs and bacon? Coconut flour pancakes? Why, NO! The one thing in the whole world that could possibly satisfy is THIS:


Start the day right Smoothie

AKA “Valerie has lost her mind and now actually craves vegetables” Smoothie.

1 cucumber, peeled and chunked. If the seeds are big and hard I’d get rid of them.

1 large handful frozen strawberries (Or whatever fruit you like – blueberry is good, but your smoothie will turn out brown. Just sayin’.)

1 large handful fresh baby spinach. From your garden if at all possible.

A good big glob of plain yogurt – maybe 1/4 cup.

2 Tbsp flax seed (half that if you have flax meal)

1 scoop vanilla protein powder, optional. There’s protein in flax and yogurt, so it’s up to you.

2-3 packets Sweetleaf stevia or natural sweetener of choice.

About 1/4 C water or juice, my blender at least doesn’t do much until there’s some liquid in there.

Blend, blend, blend away,’til you’re smoothie’s done! Sip it through a big fat straw, then exclaim “Oh yum!”.

Yes, I just wrote that to the tune of Row, Row, Row Your Boat.  Maybe this wasn’t the best way to start my day…



HCG P3 Coconut and Soy Flour Pancakes

Some of you know all about HCG, and some of you are probably quite confused about my frequent mentioning of it… others probably don’t give two straws that I’m babbling about things in code and live by unknown food rules. To make a long story short, after weight loss on HCG you come to a phase of stabilizing, where you eat certain types of food until your weight is steady over a length of time, and by this method you keep from gaining all the weight back that you lost. You re-set your metabolism. Sounds hokey? Tell that to the thousands of people whose testimonies I’ve read. Anyhoo. While stabilizing you don’t get to eat starch or sugar, which takes care of pancakes on any average day.  I started learning to bake using almond flour, but then too much almond was making me gain weight so i had to stop. I finally found that soy and coconut flours are okay for me right now, and three days out of the week you’ll find me eating pancakes adapted from this recipe. (Baking powder and corn starch are both starch so they had to go.)


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Four years later…

Four years, Weight Watchers, the 17 Day Diet,  HCG Weight Loss Solution and a total of 50 pounds later…



I know I already did a weight loss post, but I was browsing through pictures tonight and found some old ones that made me go YIKES, so I thought I’d do a comparison. I’m not trying to brag here, or show off (although I DO think this outfit would benefit from stockings with a seam up the back of the leg, don’t you? And maybe a little hat and gloves and clutch purse…), I just want to share my excitement and encourage others… a struggle with weight is not hopeless. It will take time and determination. Even now, I have more weight I could lose if I decide to go through another round of HCG. I could be a size 10 people. 10. There was a time in my life where I thought that was impossible. I thought I was just a big girl and always would be, it was the way I was made. I thought even if I wasn’t fat, I would still be big. Well, let’s just say I was delusional. I’ll never be a string bean, but neither am I destined to be huge forever.

I still plan on eventually doing a post about HCG, explaining as best I can what that’s all about and how You Too Can Look Like This. *snarky laughter*

HCG P3 Breads.

What IS this title all about? Has she gone mad? Is she using secret code for something mysterious? Well perhaps, and sort of. I couldn’t tell you what HCG stands for if my life depended on it, even though I used the HCG protocol for the last month and a half. I’d have to google it, but instead, I’ll let you!

P3, now, is Phase 3, the part where a person gets to eat food again. Of sorts. Just not sugar and starch. That’s right. No cake. No cookies. No potatoes. NO PASTA. WHAT??  Ah well, life goes on. And quite deliciously, I must admit. Admittedly, I am scouring the internet for flour-less bread and pastry substitutes, and I’ve found a few that, while they would never fool anyone into thinking they are what they stand in for, they are tasty and satisfying in and of themselves. Was that a run-on sentence? Almost?

Back to the point. The first day I was allowed to eat Anything but Sugar and Starch, I made myself some flour-less pancakes. Cream cheese, eggs and sweetener, whizzed together with my new immersion-blender (remind me to expound upon that little gadget sometime – I’m in love.)  fried up like pancakes and topped with strawberries, etc.

They LOOK like pancakes. They are not easy to flip at all, even in a non-stick pan (I tried it several ways) but in the end they make a very satisfying little stack of creamy faux pancakes.

These are YUMMY, people. And basically… you’re eating two eggs and strawberries for breakfast. Healthy pancakes! Woohoo!!

The next recipe I tried (which I have no pictures for) was the Cauliflower Pizza Crust. During my round of HCG dieting, I sat through FIVE, PRECISELY FIVE pizza parties without touching a crumb. Just sipping my cup of spiced tea and telling myself over and over that it was going to be worth it. So, indulging in anything remotely resembling pizza was a lot of fun.

Two things: A friend mentioned squeezing the water out of the cauliflower after cooking it. I either skipped over that in the instructions, or it’s not there. Either way, it’s not horrible if you don’t do this, but better if you do. Second, between the mozzarella in the crust and the mozzarella on top, it was saltier than anyone needs it to be. Does anyone ever make a lower-sodium mozz? I have toyed with the idea of making my own, and it is more and more appealing lately.

The third HCG-friendly bread-substitute that I find I enjoy is Cloud Bread. And I have no decent pictures of it, so I STOLE one to make this post prettier. If I am taken away in shackles, know that it was all for you, beloved reader.

This stuff is interesting. You separate eggs, beat the yolks with a bit of cream cheese, beat the whites until still with cream of tartar and them fold the two together and bake into little buns. Cool and place in a zip-lock bag overnight, and by morning they are transformed into what is texturally a hybrid between white bread and angel food cake and… clouds. The name is so perfect. And they are so light and curiously delicious you will probably eat all six of them in two minutes, so make a double batch. Better yet, make a double batch and mix in some cinnamon into half the batter for dessert cloud bread.

Counting down the hours…

So. I’ve been on this thing called the HCG Weight Loss Solution. Basically, you take these drops, eat a strict diet, and lose weight rather quickly. Don’t worry, it’s not a scam. It’s been around for 60 years or so, has nearly all good reviews, and I did lots of research before I began. In the last 40 days, I have lost 24 pounds and got myself down to a pant size 12. No toothpick am I, but I am thrilled to bits about this, so of course I had to go and buy clothes, HAH. *ahem*


Anyhoo, that wasn’t supposed to be the point of this post! What I meant to say is that I am literally counting down the hours here… until the next phase, where I’m off the drops and I can add more foods to my diet! I’m not going to be a hog and gain all the weight back (there’s stabilization… wait, there’s too much to this to try explaining it, why don’t you go read about it yourself? *) but seriously, you don’t appreciate eggs until you CAN NOT HAVE THEM for 6 weeks. In a nut shell, I’ve had lean protein, fruit and vegetables for that length of time, and not much else. I can’t have starch and sugar yet, but I am seeing visions of fruit and yogurt (home-made, sweetened with stevia. SO GOOD.), granola, crustless quiches and salads with actual dressing on them. I leave dreams of potatoes and desserts for a future date, right now I’d be happy with a ham and cheese omelet.


48 hours.



* DO you want to know about HCG? Because I’m willing to tell you all about it… leave a comment if you’d like info, or maybe I’ll do a post about it. I just want to be sure someone is interested before I leap into the depths of explaining this highly complex-but-successful thing.